Who says our English is bad? Just read below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-the-point, effective etc
British English vs. S'porean English
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons : I'm sorry, sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
S'poreans : No stock
RETURNING A CALL
Britons : Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone call for me a few moments ago?
S'poreans : Hello, who call?
ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY
Britons : Excuse me, I would like to get by. Would you please make way?
S'poreans : S-kew me.
WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons : Hey! Put your wallet away, this drink is on me
S'poreans : No need lah
WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons : Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
S'poreans : (pointing at the door) Can walk through ah? / Can?
Britons : Please make yourself right at home
S'poreans : No need shy one lah!
WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons : I don't recall you giving me the money
S'poreans : Where got?
WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons : I would prefer not to do that, if you don't mind
S'poreans : Don't want lah
IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons : Err...Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue
S'poreans : You siao ah?
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE
Britons : Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice? I'm trying to concentrate over here
S'poreans : Shuddup lah!
WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU.
Britons : Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for sometime. Do I know you?
S'poreans : See what, see?
WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION
Britons : We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment..
S'poreans : Die liao la!
WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons : Will someone tell me what has just happened?
S'poreans : Why liddat ah?
WHEN SOMEONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons : This isn't the way to do it. Here, let me show you
S'poreans : Liddat also don't know how to do!
Send this to your s'porean friends & let them have a laugh too. Good day!
S'poreans : Sent oredi mah!