Saturday, April 22, 2017

33 year old woman

A 65 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.
While on the operating table she had a near death experience.. Seeing God
She asked "Is my time up?"
God said, "No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a
Face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.
She even had someone come in and change her hair colour and brighten her
Teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as
Well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While
crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.
Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had
Another 33 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the
Ambulance?"

(You'll love this)

God replied:
" I didn't recognize you!!!!!"
                  😂😂😂😂

Friday, April 21, 2017

Electric Fence

Senior Sex --

The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you."

Yes, she says, "I remember it well."

OK, he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?"

"Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!"

A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having
sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble. So he follows them.

The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.

The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.

After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is.

So, as the couple passes, he says to them, "Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?"

Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply,

"Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence!"

Sunday, December 13, 2015

Starfish

早餐来了😊

A young girl was walking along a beach upon which thousands of starfish had been washed up during a terrible storm. When she came to each starfish, she would pick it up, and throw it back into the ocean. People watched her with amusement.
She had been doing this for some time when a man approached her and said, “Little girl, why are you doing this? Look at this beach! You can’t save all these starfish. You can’t begin to make a difference!”
The girl seemed crushed, suddenly deflated. But after a few moments, she bent down, picked up another starfish, and hurled it as far as she could into the ocean. Then she looked up at the man and replied, “Well, I made a difference to that one!”
The old man looked at the girl inquisitively and thought about what she had done and said. Inspired, he joined the little girl in throwing starfish back into the sea. Soon others joined, and all the starfish were saved.

Happy Sunday! ❤️🙏🏻

Friday, November 27, 2015

Traders rules

Four Multi-Millionaire Traders Share Their Thoughts On Trading
“The key is consistency and discipline,” says Richard Dennis who grew $400 into $200,000,000.

"The key is consistency and discipline. I don't think anybody winds up making money in this business because they started out lucky."

For legendary trader Richard Dennis, the importance of being consistent isn't just theory. In 1984, on a bet, Dennis trained 23 individuals off the street to religiously follow a set of trading rules. His point was to provide that discipline was the key to trading success. All but 3 of those beginner traders made over 100% return their very first year of trading and Dennis won his $1,000,000 bet. Consistent discipline is also what is taught in the "Futures in Motion" advisory service.

“It's perseverance” declares Tom Baldwin who started with $25,000 and made untold millions trading upwards of $2 billion dollars a day in T-Bond futures.

"It's perseverance. You don't need any education at all to do it … because it is like any job. If you stand there long enough, you have to pick it up."
By most accounts, Tom Baldwin may be the single largest individual trader in the T-Bond pit and Tom attributes his success to perseverance. This is a principle on which "Futures in Motion" is based. According to Tom, you need no special education to become a super trader. Ken agrees and believes that if you just follow him every day, eventually you have to pick it up.
"It is a happy circumstance that when nature gives us true burning desires, she also gives us the means to satisfy them. Those who want to win and lack skill can get someone with skill to help them."

“Always use stops” recommends Michael Marcus who turned $30,000 into $80,000,000.

"Always use stops. I mean actually put them in, because that commits you to get out at a certain point … to be a competent trader and make money is a skill you can learn."

“Get someone with skill to help” advises Ed Seykota who turned $5,000 into $15,000,000 trading commodities.

Ed Seykota lives on Lake Tahoe and trades from his office overlooking a view of incredible beauty. Ed's living his life exactly as he wants and the gentle philosopher within him wishes you to enjoy the same privilege. To Ed, it's a simple matter; if you have a true burning desire, get someone with skill to help you. Ken Seehusen and the "Futures in Motion" advisory service fits the ticket.

by adam hewison