1. The US has made a new weapon of mass destruction that destroys people
but keeps the building standing,. Its called the stock market
2. Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are ?? Wall Street is now being
called Wal Mart Street - Jay Leno
3. The difference between a pigeon and a London investment banker. The
pigeon can still make a deposit on a BMW
4. What's the difference between a guy who lost everything in Las Vegas
and an investment banker? A tie!
5. The problem with investment bank balance sheet is that on the left side
nothing's right and on the right side nothing's left.
6. I want to warn people from Nigeria who might be watching our show, if
you get any emails from Washington asking for money, it's a scam. Don't
fall for it - Jay Leno
7. Bush was asked about the credit crunch. He said it was his favourite
candy bar - Jay Leno
8. The rescue bill was about 450 pages. President Bush's copy is even
thicker. They had to include pictures - Jay Leno
9. President Bush's response was to meet some small business owners in San
Antonio last week. The small business owners are General Motors, General
Electric and Century 21 - Jay Leno
10. What worries me most about the credit crunch, is that if one of my
cheques is returned stamped 'insufficient funds'. I won't know whether
that refers to mine or the bank's
